Cute puppy…creepy girl’s voice
Is it bad to be slightly excited when it’s Devin’s naptime? I mean, when else can I clean the house, flip through a catalog, check my email, write out more announcement cards, and scoop dog poop (it’s too dark when my husband gets home)?
Is it bad to buy a toy for your kid based on whether YOU’LL like it? Because I’m sick of playing with some of these lame-o toys that they’ve designed for infants. I want some excitement. Some more tasteful music. Some talking. Something that doesn’t go, “Wheeeee!” at me all the time. Forget what he wants.
In the same vein, is it bad to covet my son’s toys? We got a very cool Leap Pad thingamajigy from Chad and Tiffany. Very cool. And the little guy just doesn’t appreciate it enough. What does he do? He lays right on it so that all of the sounds kind of go off in this rat-a-tat kind of way and it just spoils all of the fun. I want to hear about the panda’s habitat, dude. It’s all about Mommy.
Is it bad to start planning to go to Chicago to see a musical when I’ve only had my little one home for less than three weeks? Granted, the show isn’t playing until April of next year. It’s fair to plan on leaving him with Grandma at that point, right?
Is it bad to take my kid to the mall so I can get a mocha and get out of the house for a little while? He looked entirely bored in the stroller. The fluorescent lights kind of mesmerized him, but he still seemed a bit impatient with me, especially when I was trying to pick out some winter-weather attire for him at The Children’s Place. Guess he’s going to take after his dad when it comes to shopping. Damnit!
Is it bad to make my husband slightly late for work this morning because I was making toast and Dev did a big poop in his pants? I mean, c’mon…who wants to eat toast with the aroma of doo-doo wafting through the air? (Thanks, honey!)
Is it bad to call my son Poo-Poo Head after he does one of those aforementioned poopy things? We’ve also been calling him Booger Butt since he’s constantly got those little things lodged in his nose. Also Crank Shaft, Crank Monster, Grumpasaurus, and Chubba Wubba (because he loves that formula!). Basically we’re pretty cruel parents.