I own this website so I can vent if I want to

Do you ever feel like there’s just too much to do and that you’ll never get it all done?

I feel like that every day.

And I hate it.

I can’t ever seem to relax. Just relax.

I can’t seem to not worry about the laundry piling up, or the slipcover that needs to be straightened every single day, or the pet hair that shows up in every corner of every room, or the emails I need to return, or the pile of magazines I need to go through, or the scrapbook for Devin that I STILL need to start (oh, forget it…I’m going to have to go with an online photobook if I can even handle that!), or the checkbook that I need to rebalance because it was $3 off, or the desk in my office that’s piled with crap that needs to be cleaned off AGAIN, or the weeds that are undoubtedly in my garden because I never have time to keep up on them, or…EVERYTHING.

There’s so much more. I’m constantly fidgeting and anxious because my life feels so undone. As Devin eats breakfast in the morning, instead of sitting and relaxing and talking with him, I feel the need to clean the counters and the stove and empty the dishwasher (although I get points for carrying on a conversation with him and stopping periodically to look him in the eye and tell him I love him).

The anxiousness has lately, though, turned into something akin to anger. I feel snappish. I also feel as if I pretty much find something about nearly every person I encounter that rubs me the wrong way. Talk about your walking prickly pear. That’s me at this moment.

My husband has encouraged me over the years with this lovely and well-meant platitude, “I’ve got two words for you: RE LAX.” Urgh. I wish I could. I know I need to. Sometimes I can feel the blood rushing through my head, throbbing near my temples. I can feel my breath coming faster. I can feel my stomach churning. I know it’s not good for me to get so darn worked up over the seemingly little things in life.

I’m just not sure of what to do about it. A massage would certainly be a welcome short-term fix. But I think I need some serious organization skills. And perhaps a healthy dose of “Who the hell cares?” syndrome. Something. Anything. Bahhhhh!

(Oh, and that magazine Real Simple? It’s just cluttering my life with more advice than I can handle. Seriously. They want to simplify my life, but they require me to save all the damn articles in order to do it. Where am I supposed to put them? How am I supposed to remember all that crap? I think I’m going to cancel my subscription and go back to being Really Not Simple.)

10 thoughts on “I own this website so I can vent if I want to”

  1. come to chicago and let’s grab a latte at metropolis! i always feel so much better after a latte. i guess that’s my way of self-medicating.

    i do know a little about feeling like i’m never gonna catch up on everything. would you believe i’ve JUST started a filing system in my office? i’ve been with the company for over 10 years…*sigh*…i think we need some cuddle time w/ our toddlers!

  2. Oh, man…the story of our lives.
    I get so incredibly angry being left to my own devices to get everything done. Just once, I want to wake up in the morning and discover just one thing done for me. Never, ever…and I am furious more often than I care to admit.
    My husband has a technique and a concept that work for me more often than I care to admit as well.
    When I am on overload, he walks up to me as if to give me a hug and instead rubs his hands down my bum repeating “Let It Go, Let It Go.” You can’t help but laugh, or at least let the momentary madness go.
    On the concept: he was listening to some radio show a while back and a person was totally frustrated with the fact that all of these people weren’t meeting his or her expectations (including this person, I would think). The guest host advised that this person “just love them” instead of constantly believing the other person should be giving something more. I find, when I think about that, I soften a bit and a more compassionate me surfaces (even just for a minute:))

  3. I vote for the who the hell cares syndrome…as well as ditching Real Simple. I cancelled that as well as several other magazine subscriptions that were just killing trees. Less clutter, less obligation, less to worry about. I know its going to get worse once that player to be named later arrives. After surviving the job from hell that literally murdered my quality of life, the takeaway for me was to let. it. go. Serenity now! : )

  4. I’m am so glad that I’m not the only one that has been feeling this way lately! Is it the seasonal change or what? I think it feels worse for me right now because school started and Kevin and I are on opposite schedules so we are only home on the same day once a week and every other weekend. Now, I find myself keeping score more (I did the dishes SIX times this week, vacuumed three times, cooked dinner, blah,blah,blah). It’s stupid and just eats away at me too, so I’m trying not to do it. Like tonight, I say “just screw it, I’m gonna watch Desperate Housewives.” It’ll get done eventually.

  5. Don’t read this month’s issue of “Parenting” magazine. I got so pissed off after reading their article on how to clean. Like I need another article to point out how wrong I’m doing it right now. Madison Avenue’s idea of clean has really hurt a lot of women and I get tired of writers and editors perpetuating the pursuit of this unattainable goal.

    I’m trying to get to a place where I only worry about the kinds of dirt that will make us sick, i.e. kitchen and bathroom. Anything else that gets cleaned after that is just gravy.

  6. Don’t read this month’s issue of “Parenting” magazine. I got so pissed off after reading their article on how to clean. Like I need another article to point out how wrong I’m doing it right now. Madison Avenue’s idea of clean has really hurt a lot of women and I get tired of writers and editors perpetuating the pursuit of this unattainable goal.

    I’m trying to get to a place where I only worry about the kinds of dirt that will make us sick, i.e. kitchen and bathroom. Anything else that gets cleaned after that is just gravy.

  7. You’re not alone…not that that helps. I think it’s hard to relax because we all get caught up in trying to do and be everything to all people. We want the world (not necessarily talking about acquiring ‘stuff’ here), but it’s just so damned hard for one person to obtain.

  8. You’re not alone…not that that helps. I think it’s hard to relax because we all get caught up in trying to do and be everything to all people. We want the world (not necessarily talking about acquiring ‘stuff’ here), but it’s just so damned hard for one person to obtain.

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